This week has been a rollercoaster of emotions; sorrow and joy; laughter and anger, acceptance and denial; despair and hope. One moment I’m remembering the fun times we had with Dad, then the realization hits those days are over.
At other times I see his face in my mind, but then I can’t remember his words, his little sayings and his corny jokes. While there is joy in the certainty I will see Dad again when Jesus comes, there is also excruciating pain knowing I’ll have to wait until then.
The hardest part is watching Mom go through this. My heart breaks for her as she tries to find her way into a new phase of her life, making tough decisions, and facing the uncertainty of what come next.
Of course, we’re all trying to make it as easy as possible for Mom, but none of us can replace Dad. Still, I’m amazed at her strength, her faith in God, and her ability to find peace in His promises. I think, in some ways, she’s stronger than all the rest of us.
Yet, no matter how strong Mom is, there are still moments the tears flow. But she knows those tears do not fall unnoticed. Psalm 56:8 says, “You keep track of all my sorrows. You have collected all my tears in your bottle. You have [our] grieves recorded each one in your book.”
Mom knows we serve a God who feels our pain. He sees our tears. “The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit.” (Psalm 34:18) He “comforts his people and will have compassion on his afflicted ones.” (Isaiah 49:13)
Someday soon God “will wipe every tear from [our] eyes. There will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away.” (Revelation 21:4).
Until then, in the midst of our pain we take comfort in knowing we do not grieve alone. God sees each tear. He collects each one in a bottle, held close to His heart.
God bless and Happy Sabbath!